When I was young and naïve, I had dreams of forming a rock'n'roll band. I knew there were lots of stuck-up snobs full of codswallop on the local scene and I knew people generally disapproved of my making music because I wasn't part of a social élite, particularly those paid to care about music, but I also knew I only needed to find two or three others in music for the right reasons with some sense. And what do you think I'd get the break from? Your hypocrisy of course. They don't even need to be that good, technically. The trouble is, that's a bit like a girl saying she only needs to find one man to love who isn't a dickhead. How hard can it be, right?

I've become a fan of Bobby Darin. Recent tv ads from Fonterra used his song Long Line Rider. This song is about two American prisons, once notorious for reports of guards murdering inmates and torturing them by passing electric currents through their genitals. They used them as forced labour in farms before burying them. There was a Robert Redford movie about it called Brubaker.

It seems strangely appropriate for Fonterra with the implication of farms where people are buried. Certainly with the whopping prices they rig for milk and cheese, many are. I wonder if somebody was trying to give us a message, somebody unusually reputable in the ad agency...

As a professional I must only say positive things about how I am "passionate about all things web". In fact feedback I've been getting from job interviews are that I have to sell harder how passionate I am because I come across as not wanting to be there. I'm not allowed to say "negative" things in job interviews, so I feel like a dancer who has to jiggle and smile to just put that food on the table and the more the fat ugly bastards in the shadows yell obscenities, the more I have to jiggle towards them, smiling and saying "yes yes yes" in order to even eat. Then when I inevitably bump into them, I was the one asking for it.

So here are some of my passions regarding technology, focussing on the worries. I may not say these things to employers or networks or as pickup lines at a nightclub, so I need this website to prevent the truth just bottling up inside my head until Death. Remember, it's not negative to say nasty things if it's the first step to fixing them.

I am saddened that all of you believe music is just a scam to pimp groupies. It comes through all comments in work-places, pubs, schools, everywhere. Everybody should be encouraged to make music, if only to help you see it takes something and is beautiful, actually.

If I really am a pig and a guitar is just a penis, then my songs and pieces are the piglets that result from such rutting. I think some of them are quite handsome little swine and I worry deeply about protecting them from all your violation.

I had this crazy idea when I was young that I could avoid the mistakes of others; that whatever happened, if I did or didn't become the rock'n'roll star I was trying to be, I wouldn't damage my ability to marry and get along with a woman with whatever job I had to get. I would have to be able to do more than just habitually hit on the young staff-members and force girls into sex while talking disparagingly about "The Wife" when she's at home with the kids, cooking me a nice hot meal. I need my home to be a place where I can cut the crap and relax with whoever is there. It is a possible hope for happiness, and it's success in my book because I see a hope for music there too.

I always feel like a piece of meat played with by employers. It's very hard. Bosses and managers who preach what good Christians they are gloat audibly about how I'm a prettyboy and sometimes lean into me shouting how terrible I look. Sometimes, exasperated, they say "I want you to be my star" and make it clear that they employed me as bait for their rods, like the guy in Boogie Nights who got a job because "it would bring pussy into the place", only people in Wellington are way too politically correct to use that "p" word.

I have to tell you that I struggle to pay off my debts and put food on the table while I'm bait, but any pimp who does procure for you teenage virgins is going to charge fuckloads. Every old bastard who can still chug back bottles of viagra and keep his carcass kicking wants that sort of action and they outnumber such a narrow agegroup of girls a hundred to one.

I am not a pimp.

When a central bank (or World Bank) creates a country's money and only lends it to that country's circulation, it is mathematically impossible to pay the interest since only the principal was ever created.

Even the principal can't be repaid because much of it has been saved by little people and put into nest-eggs. Bankers don't accept turnips and dancing lessons as payment, only the same cash that they themselves created.

If that country trades at a profit, the next country is obviously going to lose and you create so-called "developing" countries. What's more, it only delays the inevitable for the first country which is never free from debt.